I am so sick and tired of people telling parents how to raise their children. Those people meaning the state/government, even society. Since they want to have such say they should come to someone’s home and raise the child themselves.
I remember growing up and getting beat if I disrespected my parents or anyone else, if I stole, if I lied, when the principal would call, and so on. My parents took the belt, hanger, shoe, their own hand, spoon, pencil- whatever was at reach and spanked me. I remember misbehaving out in public and my mom saying wait till we get home. I thought she was sure to forget, but the minute I stepped inside she caught me by surprise and hit me. I never acted out in public again!
I got hit a lot, and your probably saying “it obviously did no good,” but in actuality it did. Some kids learn through a “talk” or a “no television for a week” punishment and others, like myself, need that beat down to learn. I knew when to not do something- usually. I’m more of a act before you think kind of gal so there were very few of those occurrences, haha. I was not an angel at all, I coined the name “Dennis the Menace” by my uncles. I remember when I was 3 or 4 years old picking up a needle on the floor and poking a lady with it on the butt! Funny now, but back then it wasn’t- I hated being hit, hated being punished, hated not being able to go out, but today I’m thankful. I can honestly say, that if it wasn’t for my parents (mostly dad) being strict and on my ass for everything I wouldn’t have accomplished a lot today.
The parents had control back then, we call that the old school way, now it’s so bad that the children are the ones controlling the parents. They throw the police in their face all the time. When I was young, I remember saying I was going to call the police and that beating was even worse! Never, ever did I say that again. Having worked in the foster care system I see these bad ass kids threatening their parents, yelling at them and cursing at them. The parents who have an ACS case can’t do anything, but try to talk to them. What the hell is that going to do? It did nothing. They continued to be crazed animals. Yea, the children were ANIMALS!
I even remember once telling a child to go to the corner and ACS told me that was child abuse! REALLY? Looking at a wall is child abuse? Apparently, it messes with the kids mind, but 5 minutes won’t mess them up. I was told that the parents could hit their child just not to the point where it left marks. I would tell the parents just that, but honestly, once your dealing with ACS it’s hard to do so. Everything you do is under a microscope. The parents would be scared of their kids they didn’t even want to give them a look that could trigger them.
Now don’t get me wrong spanking I am all for- belt or hanger? Not my choice, should be the parents choice, but excessive corporal punishment is completely different. What was done to me was not excessive nor was it child abuse. I was never beat to the point where I couldn’t walk or was hanging on for dear life or had cut marks and bruises on me. I wasn’t called worthless, stupid, or that I was hated. My “spanking” was never just for the hell of it. Those that do that, yes it’s child abuse.
I think what needs to be taught is the difference between spanking our child, however which way be please, excessive corporal punishment and child abuse. We live in a “free” country, yet everyday it’s a new law that government is telling us what we can’t do.