$20 Lap Dance Plus Tax


Some things still haven’t changed at the strip club like their being no sex in the champagne room (usually) however, you will be getting taxed in the “champagne room.” Those private dances we well you love so much will cost you 8% more.

The New York Court of Appeals ruled in a 4-3 decision that lap dances need to be taxed. The whole case came about when Nite Moves strip club filed a lawsuit in court stating that they should be exempt from such taxes because (get this) the dances are “dramatic and are a musical art performance.” What? Now I know being a stripper is hard, I’ve attempted in climbing the pole and tried to seductively turn around the pole while in the air without trying to fall or break anything and I must say these women have their work cut out for them! However, it’s not an art! You’re seeing naked women prance around to any song with little to no experience at all.

The quote taken from Amy Silverstein’s article at Global Post quotes Judge Robert S. Smith, “Like the majority and the Tribunal, I find this particular form of dance unedifying—indeed, I am stuffy enough to find it distasteful. Perhaps for similar reasons, I do not read Hustler magazine; I would rather read the New Yorker. I would be appalled, however, if the State were to exact from Hustler a tax that the New Yorker did not have to pay, on the ground that what appears in Hustler is insufficiently ‘cultural and artistic.'” I agree to the 10th dimension of anything and everything.

I’m about 1000% sure a woman who is working as a stripper now didn’t say back in her childhood, “I want to be a stripper when I grow up to express myself and create art.” Okay, so I went a bit overboard, but you catch my drift. Art is everywhere and in everything we all know this, unless you didn’t know until now, but stripping is not art. Opening up your legs and sticking your ass in the air for dollars is not creativity, this goes for both men and women. So, no you can’t be exempt from paying taxes Nite Moves! Now start making it “thunderstorm” because you owe $124,000 in back taxes.

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